Working On Me

There are some people who are capable of handling all the challenges of life with little to know help. Seemingly, they reach their goals single handedly. However, this is not the case for most of us. The majority of us require guidance, help, and support every step of the way.

Have you ever had to work in groups at school? Most people hate it because group members are chosen willy nilly. Clashing personality types battle it out while the group’s goal goes go unrmet — as well as your own needs. But what if you could hand pick the members of your group?

You may not even know you have trust issues until you’re in a position where you’re forced to trust someone with something important to you. When you realize you can’t do it all or need to function as a member of a team, you’ll be forced to realize that you do, indeed, have trust issues.

I’m a psychology student and a people watcher. In one class, I watched our group leader rewrite group members’ contributions. She was a force of nature. Introverts conceded just to get away from her. Extroverts locked horns and battle lines were drawn. I like to refer to it as the ‘semester from hell.’

If you have the attitude that no one can do it as well as you can, then you’re kidding yourself. Worse yet, you’re missing out on acquiring useful information because there’s someone who has information you need, but you’ll never know it because of your attitude. It is important to start trusting other members of the team, and if you’re the only person on the team, you need to ask for help.

Working in groups can be tricky, but there’s greater benefits than working as the lone ranger. You can alleviate potential problems by choosing individuals that are best for the task at hand. Do you watch the television series Ruby? In her quest to lose weight, Ruby hand picked the members of her group–her nutritionist, personal trainer, and psychologist — and it’s working. She’s lost more weight than ever.

When you delegate tasks to achieve your goals, you need to assign the right task to the right person. This means that you need to understand the individual before assigning a task. What is a person’s area of strength? If you’re not good at time management, obviously you need to look for someone who is.

If you are having problems reaching a goal, why not rely on a professional to gain skills in your area of weakness? A psychologist or psychiatrist can help you figure out your issues, but a life coach will help you solve your problem. Life coaches are trained to help you achieve your goals — they are not therapists. Many are available online who can give you exercises, tips, and guidelines to follow.

An important first step is to admit you don’t know it all and could use some help. If you’re ready to accept direction, consider hiring a life coach.